When someone new comes over to our house, my parents drag out a video of me from the fourth or fifth grade. In the video, I introduce myself and tell everyone that my favorite subject in school is math. Now, over a decade later, that’s still true! I’m well into my third year at Queen’s University in Kingston, Ontario, where I’m studying applied mathematics and mechanical engineering.
Growing up in Cochrane, a small town just outside Calgary, Alberta, I lived with my immediate family — my mom, dad, and younger sister. My “mushum” (grandpa) and many other members of my family lived five hours away on the Goodfish Lake Reserve. My dad is an engineer. He graduated with his MBA in 2007 after a period of working full time and taking night classes while also raising a young family. I was so fortunate to have my mom at home with my sister and me. Before my mom had us, she worked as a laboratory and X-ray technician.
Both my parents were the first generation in their families to get advanced degrees, and they always made it clear that it was important for my sister and me to go to university to obtain a higher level of education. I was lucky to have had both supportive parents and supportive teachers.
In high school, my advanced mathematics teacher was Mrs. Lozinski. Not only did I love math, but also I loved being taught by a woman. This paved my path and my interpretation of what it means to be a female in mathematics/STEM. When you’re at such an impressionable age, having someone you look up to breaking those gender normative barriers absolutely has an effect on how you perceive gender roles once you become an adult.
My experience in high school gave me the confidence to apply to a variety of universities. I was also an athlete, rowing competitively, so I may have had a more personal experience than many other students applying to college. Having different contacts with coaches and Indigenous outreach coordinators at the universities enabled me to make an educated decision on which school to choose. Queen’s has a great rowing program, and it also has a strong engineering program.
Once I got to Queen’s, I was excited! I threw myself into rowing and a variety of other activities to take my mind off the fact that I was a three-hour drive and a four-hour flight from my home. I was definitely nervous about being so far away. But Queen’s makes it easy to diversify your interests. I rowed, I’m part of the engineering program, I volunteer as a swim coach for the Special Olympics, and I’m involved in AISES and a variety of other organizations on campus.
I love being a part of these organizations because it allows me to help people access opportunities they wouldn’t necessarily be able to otherwise. Especially working with Special Olympics, I love being able to work with athletes and assist them on their journeys. It shows that you can always succeed, regardless of the barriers you may face. Being surrounded by such diverse groups of people has kept me motivated and gives me the opportunity to create a strong community.
My academics at Queen’s have always been a source of enjoyment as well. Here, you don’t determine what field of engineering you want to pursue until nearly the end of your first year. By that time, I had figured out that chemistry wasn’t for me, but that applied mathematics and mechanical engineering were right up my alley! My program specifically is almost 50 percent women, which is practically unheard of in these fields.
All of these positives are not to say that my university experience hasn’t been without issue. I was sexually assaulted my first year at Queen’s, and it wasn’t until my second year that I decided to pursue an investigation with the university. I went through experiences that I wish no other survivor would need to endure. It was a very challenging time. Prior to the assault I was a top performer at school, and felt as though my life was put together. After the assault I lost some of my identity, having also lost many friends and being unsure of how to move forward. I even quit rowing. Six months later, however, I decided to make a change. I started rowing a month before Team Alberta trials, and ended up making the team. I had the privilege of representing my province at the 2017 Canada Summer Games. A year later, I began volunteering at Sagesse, a branch of the Calgary Women’s Domestic Violence Center, to help others.
My whole life I struggled with how much I should identify as Indigenous versus non-Indigenous. Where I grew up, I had few opportunities to learn about my heritage and culture. There was also a great presence of racism against Indigenous peoples in the town. However, in my second year at Queen’s, I got involved with AISES, and while our school doesn’t have an official chapter yet, I served as the group’s treasurer, and also attended the first ever .caISES conference. There, I met so many amazing people it really solidified my desire to explore my culture and my heritage further. Now, I smudge almost every morning. AISES helped me reconnect with my culture and offers so many opportunities for those involved!
Thankfully, I still have some time before I graduate, so I don’t have to know exactly what I want to do next. I do know that whatever I do, I want to make an impact.
My grandpa has been a huge source of inspiration to me, and he always says, “The sun is still going to rise tomorrow.” I keep that in the back of my mind whenever I get down or discouraged, because there are always difficult times. He’s taught me how to keep going, assist others, and stay positive. These things are so important in today’s world. You never know where life is going to take you, so having a positive attitude and being open to learning from others are great characteristics to have. We’re all facing personal battles, but don’t give up on yourself — the sun is still going to rise tomorrow.
